Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
