I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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