That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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