question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
