Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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