Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
