I wish I could punch you in the face.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
