i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
