All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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