margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I seem to have left my pride at pride
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
