I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
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