Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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