FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
