so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
