forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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