Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
