I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
