O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize