Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
