she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
