I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
