You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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