WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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