She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I touched a dick in church today
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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