1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
