White coat. Heels.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
