I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
