Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
