I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Brb crying the tears of my youth
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
