I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
