I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Green mimosas i think yes
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Randomize
