He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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