There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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