and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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