yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
