I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
