That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
