I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
So vagazzling was a success
I need a beard to bite.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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