Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Just high enough for therapy.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
