You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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