I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
