stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
