She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
