after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
