You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
