Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
