people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
