you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
