I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
