Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
